SARAH SILVERMAN is single again? Hot damn! I’m gonna ask her out. I’d love to tap me some of that hot racist-joking Jew booty. Heeeeells yeeuh, nugguh. Sorry but I totally think Jewish chicks are hot. For some reason their voices sound aw-sumly sexay to my ears.
damn skippy i’d tap it like there’s no tomorrow.
O-Kay. That’s enuff of that.
If if Agnie and Brad actually sell their baby photos I’ll take it as a sign of the end times. Seriously, 15 mil could feed like 5 starving nations. Don’t go snatching kids from starving, piss-poor countries if you’re just going to laugh at those starving, piss-poor countries years later as you count your cash and wipe your asses with benjamins when you could be sending them a nice chunka change to help them sort themselves out. Kay? Kay.
I’m Out.
HOMIGAWD. Angelina Jolie had BABIES last night. BABIES. And the whole world has to know! Wait… the whole world DOES know! This is exciting news, people! Do you know what this means?
It means Angelina Jolie likes to fuck.
That’s it. That’s all it means, and that’s hardly news. Also? Babies get born all the time. Who gives a goddamn shit that she had a couple? The only thing that gets me excited about this is that she must have some godlike jubblies now. Let’s hope to see them in the next movie, huh?
I’m out, mofos.
SO I’M KILLING time at work, reading articles on Cracked.com on my laptop, laughing my ass off so loud that I’m scaring people. Now I have a headache. I just ingested 300mg worth of caffeiene to get RID of my headache, and now I have one again because I just had a fucking LAUGHING FIT that lasted for about 10 minutes. Why?
Pancakes. Fucking pancakes is why. You’ll see what I mean in a bit:
WARNING: You will laugh uncontrollably for about 10-15 minutes, resulting in you looking like a retarded asshole to anyone who happens to happen by. View this in private. You have been warned. Also, you might want to have an asprin or a good source of caffeine nearby to get rid of the headache you will get from the previously-mentioned laughing fit.
And now, PANCAKES.
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